Monday, September 24, 2007

Monday Muffins


OK - now...I respect the artistry of Marcel Marceau. Really, I do.

But I just have to wonder...how many jokes have been cracked about having a "moment of silence" for the world's most famous mime?

Well, add one more to the list. I swear to God, when I saw this headline that's the first thing I thought.

The second thing was...I wonder how many people hated Marcel Marceau just because he was a mime? Mimes in general are despised by many folks I know. I mean, you can only walk against the wind or be trapped in a box so many times before people start walking away while shaking their heads in disgust.

I'm just sayin'. At any rate, RIP Marcel Marceau.

NEXT...

Today's "Huh?" award is unique in the sense that it's awarded to a product...not very common here at Rancho Sudiegirl. At first glance, I thought I should give it the "Scrappy Doo" for being un-necessary, and I could still do that.

However, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that YES...this does indeed qualify for a "Huh?"

Today's recipient: Del Monte Foods, who (unbeknownst to me until today) makes dog treats. In particular, Del Monte makes Snausages.
Reason for award: Well...gee. Click HERE to go to a website for their latest product, Snausages Paw Prints dog treats.

Here's the schtick...the dog treats have trivia from the 2008 Guinness Book of World Records printed on each one. Yes, every li'l nibble contains trivia about who has the longest toenails, or who made the biggest pumpkin pie, or whatever. Whoopee!

Judge's comments:

Uh...say it with me now....

DOGS. CAN'T. READ.

Be one with the concept, y'all.

Yes, I KNOW that the trivia is for the humans. I'm down with that. But let's face it...anyone who has ever had a dog knows that if you bring out treats, the dog is not going to allow you to absorb these bits o' knowledge. In fact, some may try to rip your hand off while you're saying, "Jeez! I thought the largest ball of twine was in Minnesota!" with a Snausage in your hand.

I saw the coupon for these tasty puppy treats in yesterday's Sunday paper, whilst perusing the Washington Post at my local McDonalds. I almost spit Diet Coke on D, that's how goofy this concept was.

You know, the Yugo may have been a flop, but at least the concept of the Yugo was something based on reality.

Thank God they're chicken flavored...that's all I have to say.

And finally...Today's "Old Fart" award is also based on a snack treat...the doughnut. What is the proper spelling for this pastry anyway? Is it "doughnut" or "donut"? Am I digressing? I think not.
Anywho...I needed to get this award out of mothballs. I figure why the hell not? It's Monday, I'm catching up on blog entries, and why not indeed.

So...today's recipients are: The senior citizens that patronize the Senior Center in Mahopac, N.Y

Reason for award: They're mad as hell, and they aren't gonna take it anymore. From the article, which can be read in full here:

It was just another morning at the senior center: Women were sewing, men were playing pool — and seven demonstrators, average age 76, were picketing outside, demanding doughnuts.

They wore sandwich boards proclaiming, "Give Us Our Just Desserts" and "They're Carbs, Not Contraband."

Yep, the old folks are tired of being told what to eat.

County officials in Putnam County, NY are in conflict with some of these seniors about a decision regarding baked goods. From the article:

At issue is a decision to refuse free doughnuts, pies and breads that were being donated to senior centers around Putnam County, north of New York City. Officials were concerned that the county was setting a bad nutritional precedent by providing mounds of doughnuts and other sweets to seniors...

And of course, with donated goods, you never know what's going to happen.

Stan Tuttle, coordinator of nutritional services for the county's Office for the Aging, said the program had gotten out of control. As many as 16 cases of breads, cakes and pastries were delivered, by various means, to the William Koehler Memorial Senior Center each day. Some were moldy and some had been stored overnight in the trunks of volunteers' cars, he said.
Some of the older folks are protesting because they miss the food, but others are protesting because they feel they're being treated like children. As one person put it, "I'm 86, not 8."

Other senior citizens at this center weren't bothered by the change, either because of personal reasons or other categories. Caregivers seemed to be concerned as well regarding the balance of nutrition versus tasty treats. The article explains it quite well, so I suggest you click on the link to check it out further.

Judge's comments:

OK. First of all, as you know, my dad's parents were extremely long-lived. They both died in their early hundreds. (Is it just me, or is it weird to write that?)

Anyway...in their "twilight years" (or whatever you wish to call it) their dietary habits incorporated some of the following items:

A case of Mountain Dew (the full sugar version...none of that diet stuff)
Donut (or is it doughnut) holes
Sterzings' potato chips
Oreo cookies
microwavable breakfasts
microwavable TV dinners
hydroponic tomatoes
catfish on Friday from one of the local restaurants
chocolate covered cherries
other items as events warranted

Now many of these items could send a body to junk food junkie heaven, for sure. However, you have to understand that my grandparents' appetites were on a par with the average supermodel. In other words, approximately two or three bites of each thing and that was it.

So for Grandma & Grandpa Dawson, doughnuts (or is it donuts) wouldn't be such a big deal as they weren't in the habit of stuffing their faces with the stuff.

However, not everyone's habits are like theirs. I can honestly envision some seniors over-indulging on sweets. I've witnessed it before, and I'm sure I'm not the only one. I'm not an expert on geriatric care in the slightest, but I do agree that some controls need to be placed.

Why?

Well, although one gentleman said that he's 86, not 8, not all seniors are in the same boat. Some don't have self control due to dementia issues. Others are just plain ol' pigs. Unfortunately in this case, the needs of the many don't necessarily outweigh the needs of the few.

The best solution?

I have no idea. I'm not old. I don't know.

Hell, I don't even know if they're spelled "doughnuts" or "donuts".