Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Should this be called an "Oreo-de"?

Well, I don't know. All I know is this idea for a post popped into my head last night as I was drifting off to sleep, and it hasn't really let go of the psyche. So here we go into the land of sugar, flour, lard and other assorted preservatives, flavors and colorings. Thank God for Nabisco.

So let's discuss the beloved Oreo.

I am one of those freaks that doesn't twist open the Oreo and eat the filling first. Hell, no!

I'm an unrepentant dunker of the species. Unlike my mother, however, I am specifc in what I dunk said Oreo INTO. (Click here to read about my mother's dunking habits...)

I do not dunk Oreos into ANYTHING but milk. No coffee, no Kool-aid (at least not since I was, like, seven years old or so), no Bailey's Irish Creme (a favorite of Ed H's). Nope...milk is it, baby. Not even CHOCOLATE milk. Nope...only "white" milk will do. Since I was raised mostly on 2% or skim, I find whole milk to be a li'l TOO rich for my blood. I might be persuaded to dunk in chocolate milk, but usually if I have a choice, it's the white.
(Note to sensitive readers: do not formulate theories about how I might be racist because I choose chocolate milk over white and it's a white supremacy thing...I like chocolate milk, but I like it BY itself and I don't like to compromise it with other food items...I simply like a clear palate for the stuff. Thank you, the management.)
Also, if given a choice, I like the regular Oreos as opposed to the "Double Stuf" kind. I really liked the "Double Stuf" kind when I was a kid, and I know that was my dad's "preferred" style as well. But as I've gotten older, I've discovered that the regular Oreo has the perfect balance of filling and cookie for me. If you've got too much filling, it's kind of gritty, and I don't like that. It's all about the "feng shui" of the cookie.

Now I know Nabisco's gotten fancy on me and they pull out the mint filling...the peanut butter filling...the chocolate filling...and I'm down with that, I guess. But I won't be buyin' 'em anytime soon. I've tried them and they just don't do it for me. Now the fudge COVERED ones, or the white-chocolate COVERED ones...that's a different story. Gimme gimme gimme. It's cheaper to cover your own Oreos with fudge instead of letting Nabisco do it, though. I don't know if Nabisco cares about that or if it'll affect their marketing, but just a heads up for cheap-asses like myself.

And finally...I advocate Oreos for breakfast, but NEVER, matter how much you try...should they be combined with beer.