YOWLIE! (title dedicated to Edward H.)

Project offers free colon tests for poor
(True/false, multiple choice or essay?)









Female singer/songwriters still have avenues to be heard
(What about boulevards? Promenades? Streets?)









Man gets 8 months for taping Jackson
(Dude...next time use GLUE!)








____

Well, life is puttering along smoothly. I had lunch with my friend L. this afternoon, and I have to say that I'm happy we're friends.

Why?

Because he's a musician type that's MY age, who works in the same band that I do, and we just enjoy talking to each other. We're brainstorming and trying to figure out ways to better market the band to the public. We have lousy demos in our history, and the band manager doesn't want to invest in a good demo of us for whatever reason. He just has NO aptitude for advertising whatsoever. So anyway, we have worked up some ideas and hopefully can have a get-together with other band-mates that are like-minded. We'll see...

Beyond that, my life is exceedingly boring so let's look at the rest of the world, shall we?

In the "Sudiegirl would be WAY embarrassed to do this" department...read all about the swingers convention. Now I have a healthy drive (healthy for me, anyway...) but I just can't see myself doing this. I can just imagine the meeting planners for this...

"OK...we have breakfast scheduled at 8:30, followed by group sex in the pool at 9, group sex in the meeting room at 10, and a lecture at 10:30 on 'Why group sex is being held at 11 AM instead of 12:30 PM'. Is there something I'm forgetting?"

"What about the vibrator seminar?"

"Oh, that's tomorrow...remember, we're passing out complimentary batteries in the goody bags."

"I hope the KY jelly doesn't leak all over like last year."

So see...every job has its trials and tribulations.

Next, in the "Envision bitter teens chucking rotten vegetables" department, Kevin Federline is the closing act at the Teen Choice Awards.

Exsqueeze me? Baking Powder?

At this point, I'm doubtful that there are any teens out there that like ol' Britney Spears, much less her husband K-Fed. He needs to go back to work at the pretzel stand in the mall and just give it up. He made Thomas Dolby mad, and that makes ME mad. I just hope that the Teen Choice Awards broadcast gets interrupted at the exact point he gets on stage to make a fool of himself. That will reinforce my faith in "Big Ernie", for sure.

And finally, another new award from Rancho Sudiegirl, Inc. , where our motto is "Don't get between the fat lady and the ice cream". This award was created because I didn't think the rest of the awards applied.

Therefore, the latest in Rancho Sudiegirl's awards...I give you...the Bonehead Award. This award is given to a person or persons who make a really stupid decision to please the public who may or may not give a tinker's damn about the results in the first place.

Today's Recipients: PBS Kids Sprout network

Reason: Melanie Martinez, star of the "Good Night Show", was taken off the air because she alerted her employers that she was involved in two "Technical Virgin" videos.

These are SPOOFS (very important to keep that in mind) of PSAs on how to keep your virginity.

OK...I applaud her for being honest. However, this is a perfect example of how many people are still incapable of separating real life from what they see on TV. I know that children watch the show - but how many kids are watching "Technical Virgin"? Huh? It's a TV SHOW.

She plays a character - it's not like she's pulling a Michael Jackson and being herself on the show. She's not physically or mentally hurting children in the age range that she plays to on her show. She is a working actress and as such, should be allowed to WORK. If PBS is anything like public radio, you're not necessarily paid very well for what you do. If the parents can't handle that concept, then they really need to think about how many things in life they had to compromise.

It's a hard choice, isn't it?

I probably would have been fired myself if I were a PBS Kids Sprout exec because I would have said, "Don't worry about it. We'll cover you."

On that note, I will bid you adieu...

Sudiegirl (Would it be "La Femme Sudie" in French?)

PS: Edward H. left this comment, and I had forgotten about the significance of this until he reminded me. To quote:

Remember the good old days at PBS, when Skip Hinnant could get the Electric Company gig despite having voiced Fritz The Cat? Ah, for the good old days...

Yep, the '70's were definitely more tolerant...but then again, they may not have even seen "Fritz the Cat". BTW, it's a movie I recommend for anyone who has the urge to watch cute, cuddy cartoon characters smoke dope and have lots of sex.