Tuesday, April 10, 2007

sorry i've been a delinquent...


Yes, your favorite crabby internet girl...Sudiegirl...has been MIA the past few days.

You should be concerned, you know.

Why?

For one thing, I...VOLUNTARILY, mind you...watched GOLF.

I like a good sporting match, like anyone else. I've watched some good ball games in my time. I did my time in pep band (high school) and watched some exciting sports events.

But GOLF? The only golf I've even ATTEMPTED to play is miniature. If it doesn't have windmills and alligators grabbing at the golf balls, I'm usually lost.

However, my new musical collaborator (whom I am dubbing "Skippy") advised me that if we rehearsed on Easter Sunday, The Masters tournament would be an integral part of the day. I advised him if that was the case, he'd better supply some beer because that was the only way he'd get me to sit still for it. (Better living through liquid grain in a can, I always say...)

I figured, "Hey, it'll be boring, Tiger Woods or the other guy will win, and I'll be off the hook emotionally...no surprises, no muss, no fuss."

*Insert sound of God laughing at me HERE*

I'm not sure what happened other than some kind of divine cosmic experience.

First of all, it was historic because the winner - one Mr. Zach Johnson, a fellow Iowegian - was the first Iowa golf pro to win any kind of a title in a little over 50 years. F-I-F-T-Y. Count 'em.

Second, this guy BEAT Tiger Woods!!! (BTW, Tiger looked a little worse for wear on the final day...I'm not sure if he was ill, tired, or what...I can't even tell you for sure if he is a new daddy yet or not. All I know is he looked un-well. Hot, yes...but still un-well.)

Thirdly, I found myself...uh...cheering. At the right times, yet. (Quit laughing, y'all.) I finally UNDERSTOOD the fascination with golf. It's sports, physics, and Zen meditation...all in one. Plus you get to dress "business casual" all day on the links, so it's a win-win.

Finally, these words came out of my mouth...

"Skippy...can you teach me how to play golf?" He just smiled and said yes. I told him to quit smiling at me, dammit. He didn't. I wasn't surprised.

*Sudiegirl shakes head in wonder*

So I guess more than one miracle happened on Easter.

The next scheduled miracle...whether or not Don Imus can talk his way out of this li'l snafu.

Apparently, Imus (whom I've never listened to, and probably never will at this rate) is suffering from a severe case of hoof in mouth disease combined with no regrets.

He called the majority of players in Rutgers' women's basketball team a very unsavory racial epithet. Another former Iowan (C. Vivian Stringer) who is a kick-a$$ basketball coach (and the rest of the ladies) will be weighing in on his comments according to the first article I linked to.

Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson - understandably so - are ANGRY. So is NOW (National Organization for Women). I don't think I would want to mess with Vivian Stringer and her basketball team either...Stringer is quite tenacious and doesn't take things like this very lightly.

Imus' show has been suspended for two weeks. Not enough, say those who are offended. He needs to go down the same path as Michael Richards and apply for a job in the produce department of his local Safeway grocery store, from the looks of things. He could be burned in effigy, for all I know.

Apparently, Imus' comments are not rare. Among those descriptors used on his show:

Imus or his cast have called Colin Powell a "weasel," New Mexico Gov. Bill Richardson a "fat sissy" and referred to Sen. Ben Nighthorse Campbell of Colorado, an American Indian, as "the guy from `F Troop.'" He and his colleagues also called the New York Knicks a group of "chest-thumping pimps."
Again, he's saying he's a good guy who did a bad thing, or something to that effect.

Apparently, many politicos and other celebrities love him and his format. But that love is starting to fade...Cal Ripken Jr. cancelled an appearance, but Sen. John McCain has not.

However, one thing from the two articles I've read has stood out...Sharpton's comment:

"You have anchormen from network news, you have senators, you have presidential candidates that come on your show. Are we saying that it is acceptable in the middle of these kinds of candidates and anchorman for you to call my daughter a ho?" said Sharpton, whose college-age daughter appeared on the show.

Wow. You know, that statement right there is something significant...it really opens up something about Sharpton to me. His DAUGHTER was lumped in that unfortunate Imus statement. That adds extra anger to Sharpton's side of the fence, you know? I don't care who you are...if you're a dad to a daughter, and someone makes a crack like that, that's inexcusable.

And of course, the answer to Sharpton's question posed above is...NO. It's not acceptable for someone behind a microphone/table/desk (or combinations thereof) to say things like that.

Why?

Because when anchor personalities/hosts get behind those contraptions, they are no longer private persons. Those hosts are looked at as "authorities", and it takes lots of back-tracking and explanations to get back to where they were before the foot was inserted neatly into the mouth. Maybe people that listen to them are savvy enough to "get the joke", but maybe not. One never knows.

Plus, you NEVER know whose daughter you're lippin' off about.

I'm learning a lot from these celebrities...I don't always apply what I've learned but I am trying. (Sometimes very trying.)

Should Imus be fired?

Even with freedom of speech in place?

Your thoughts please...insert them neatly in the comments, thank you.

And with that, I'm out of here. I wonder if K-Mart sells womens' golf shoes? Something tells me I'm gonna need 'em.

See ya on the links...I'll be the one stuck in the sand trap, cursing like a sailor.