Beauty and the blog

Tuesdays…yet another one in a myriad of Tuesdays. (BTW, painting from www.naturesedgestudio.ca)

(Oh God…was that PRETENTIOUS or what?)

Well, it’s a glorious day…the weather is supposed to be nice and agreeable. This is a good thing.

But on my Metro ride this morning, I made the mistake of reading the paper. Now, this in and of itself shouldn’t be a problem. It usually isn’t, anyway.

Today, however, it was. Why?

I started thinking about beauty. I KNOW philosophers through the ages have wrestled with it, they were better humans because of it, etc. But when you’re a lowly plebe like myself who isn’t used to such “fancy thinkin’”, then you’ve got a major migraine on your hands.

The Merriam-Webster online dictionary defines “beauty” and “beautiful” as:

Main Entry: beau·ty Pronunciation: 'byü-tEFunction: nounInflected Form(s): plural beauties
Etymology: Middle English beaute, from Old French biauté, from bel, biau beautiful, from Latin bellus pretty; akin to Latin bonus good -- more at BOUNTY
1 : the quality or aggregate of qualities in a person or thing that gives pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit : LOVELINESS
2 : a beautiful person or thing; especially : a beautiful woman
3 : a particularly graceful, ornamental, or excellent quality
4 : a brilliant, extreme, or egregious example or instance <that mistake was a beauty>5 : a quantum characteristic that accounts for the existence and lifetime of the upsilon particle; also : a particle having this characteristic

Main Entry: beau·ti·ful
Pronunciation: 'byü-ti-f&lFunction: adjective
1 : having qualities of beauty : exciting aesthetic pleasure2
2 : generally pleasing : EXCELLENT- beau·ti·ful·ly /-f(&-)lE/ adverb- beau·ti·ful·ness /-f&l-n&s/ noun
synonyms BEAUTIFUL, LOVELY, HANDSOME, PRETTY, COMELY, FAIR mean exciting sensuous or aesthetic pleasure.

BEAUTIFUL applies to whatever excites the keenest of pleasure to the senses and stirs emotion through the senses <beautiful mountain scenery>.

LOVELY is close to BEAUTIFUL but applies to a narrower range of emotional excitation in suggesting the graceful, delicate, or exquisite <a lovely melody>.

HANDSOME suggests aesthetic pleasure due to proportion, symmetry, or elegance <a handsome Georgian mansion>.

PRETTY often applies to superficial or insubstantial attractiveness <a painter of conventionally pretty scenes>.

COMELY is like HANDSOME in suggesting what is coolly approved rather than emotionally responded to <the comely grace of a dancer>.

FAIR suggests beauty because of purity, flawlessness, or freshness <fair of face>.

(BTW, were you expecting the 5th definition for “beauty” (the quantum particle stuff)? Neither was I.)

What human beings seem to forget (myself included, I’m afraid) is the second half of that definition: gives pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit.

What kind of globbeldy gook is that, you say? It’s definitely subjective. What I see as “giving pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalting the mind or spirit” isn’t the same as what my sister sees, or what my mother sees, even though we share the same genetic code. It’s similar in some respects, but not the same all the way across the board.

But society (especially American society)...I just want to smack our collective society in the head with a blunt instrument. Individualism is so twisted these days, you know?

For example, I’m going to be noble for a moment and defend Britney Spears (and NO, I’m not ill. This feeling will pass, I guarantee, once she opens her mouth and says something stupid).

People are giving her static because she has taken a while to shed the weight from her pregnancy. (Gee…just like a NORMAL person.) According to one scandal sheet, the report on Britney is:

Alarmed by reports that stress over her 27-year-old husband Kevin
Federline's reported cheating has begun to make her physically sick and that Britney has been stuffing herself with junk food — her weight has skyrocketed to 140 pounds in recent weeks —

OH BIG F’ING DEAL!!!!!!!! One hundred forty pounds? I haven’t weighted one hundred forty pounds since my sophomore year in high school. If she’s eating junk food, then she should cut back, but she is NOWHERE near the point where she has to order muu-muus from Lane Bryant. Britney can still find flattering, nice-looking clothes that fit and as she slowly and carefully loses the weight (if she chooses to), she’ll be fine. But NOOOOO -- Hollyweird insists that their women (at least the women that aren’t comedy relief) have babies and then lose the weight within two months so they can go make more hoochie-mama videos or movies. So since she’s not fitting Hollyweird’s idea of one who gives pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit, it’s OK to rake her over the coals for gaining weight. I’m not a Britney fan, never have been, but it’s a lot on ANYONE to have a baby.

She’s trying to learn how to be married every day, she has a baby that requires round-the-clock attention, and she has people pressuring her, saying bad things about her and her husband. Who wouldn’t take solace in Oreos? Hell, I do it when I have a hangnail…but I digress.

The point is, she’s not allowed to be normal because she’s in the spotlight, and at one time, she was OK with it. Now, her life has gotten more complicated and people expect her to be a teenager again. The public (myself included, I’m ashamed to say) looks at her as an image, not a real person that can love and care about another. She’s not the same person anymore; her life is more complex. It’s like she’s evolved and the public has not. So there’s that scenario…

Meanwhile, we have supermodel Kate Moss.

Kate has been struggling with drug addiction, has a boyfriend who also struggles with drug addiction, and she is very slim (I think to the point of emaciation). I know many people (more knowledgeable than I on the subject of beauty – like designers, fashion photographers, makeup artists) think she’s beautiful.

She gives pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit, in other words. At least, advertisers and fashion designers want us to think that.

Well, here comes the individualism in me…I don’t think she’s “beautiful”. Part of it is because I’m hetero, but not all of it. If I had to dissect her flaws (which I’m all too happy to do), she looks dazed all the time. Even after the drug problem slowly went away, she still looks like she’s not quite sure where she is. Her eyes are wide-set and don’t seem to track straight, like a chameleon – or Marty Feldman. She looks like a strong wind could tip her over at any moment, and it’s just not healthy. But people say she’s beautiful. Maybe she is as far as her personality and intellectual level is. I can’t see it, though…and we’re not encouraged to, either.

I am definitely flawed…I am over weight, today my skin has decided to become an oil slick for some reason, and I am a habitual nail-biter. I’m short waisted, I tend to slouch, and I wear glasses as thick as Coke bottle bottoms (for those who remember the glass bottles). I dye my hair. (GASP!)

But I have good points too. When I’m not wearing my glasses, I get compliments on my eyes. (I can’t see the person giving me the compliment, though). I feel I’m a lot better conversationalist than I used to be (thank you lithium/Lamictal!). I work hard to try and do the right thing by people. I try to be loving and tolerant of people that aren’t like me. I sing and try to bring people joy and fun when I do so.

Is that good enough for society at large?

Who cares…it’s good enough for me. It’s good enough for D, my friends, and my family.

So bottom line? If I give pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit of the people I care about, that’s good enough for me. If Britney Spears is a good mother to Sean Preston and a good wife to “K-Fed”, that’s more important than anything. If Kate Moss has cleaned up her act and is trying to be more than just a designer clothes hanger with a head, fine by me. Even if I'm not impressed with them, it's not my job to be impressed in the first place. Nor is it their job to give a tinker's damn about me. But we should still care about others instead of categorizing and only looking at the surface.

I guess we all have to look deeper and try harder to find the beauty when it’s not shoved in our faces, don’t we?

Sudiegirl