And now, from the "Explain her appeal to me one more time" files, and Yahoo! News...

Sudiegirl sez:

I am still trying to figure out what is so mystifying...she seems like an open book to me...can you say "former Okie cracker Wal-Mart cashier"? My god, even that reality show on E! sucked ass like a Hoover, and moreover, didn't really do much to make me jealous of her lifestyle. I can see why the damn dog needed Prozac.

But read on, my dear friends...I can't conceive why the drug (excuse me, HERBAL SUPPLEMENT) company is being sued because she dressed and acted like...well, herself. I'll do what I do best in the meantime...

Trimspa Sued Over Anna Nicole Smith
51 minutes ago
LOS ANGELES -

Anna Nicole Smith went too far, a production company has charged, and it wants Trimspa to pay for it. (Jeez, usually if Anna Nicole Smith goes too far, it's a redneck's dream, isn't it?)

The producer of the Live 8 concerts has filed a lawsuit against Trimspa Inc., claiming that the company's reputation was damaged by the buxom Trimspa spokeswoman's attire and conduct during a televised concert last summer. (How can that be? They were rock concerts, not the Joffrey Ballet! If they're worried about behavior during a televised rock concert, they'd better not televise the damned thing in the first place.)

Live 8 Productions LLC is seeking more than $500,000 in compensatory damages, claiming Trimspa failed to pay for a handful of 30-second promotional spots that aired during the July 2 broadcast on ABC. The lawsuit also seeks unspecified punitive damages, as well as additional unspecified damages for Smith's behavior. (Personally, I think anyone who has been subjected to watching Anna Nicole Smith on TV against their will deserves the punitive damages more than some faceless corporation.)

The accusations involving Smith, who is not named as a defendant, are contained in a lawsuit filed last week in federal court. The lawsuit states that Smith was instructed to dress "in an appropriate fashion for a charitable event." (Again...rock concert...appropriate dress...something in the water does not compute.)

But when Smith appeared in Philadelphia, one of 10 cities participating in the concerts, she was "intoxicated and scantily clad in revealing attire completely inappropriate for a broadcast that would be seen by millions of people in the United States and then rebroadcast throughout the world," the lawsuit said. (Obviously, the yutzes didn't see that Anna Nicole just acts like that...just another Saturday night for our redneck pinup girl!)

The lawsuit cited Smith as having "unbecoming and erratic behavior," claiming it damaged the concerts' reputation and goodwill in the entertainment industry and called for additional damages. (Sounds like they missed her MTV act, huh? And something tells me that many influencial males in the entertainment industry were JUST FINE with Ms. Smith's behavior, requesting lap dances and massages after the show.)

Smith's lawyer, Howard K. Stern, called the accusations "pure fiction and totally irresponsible." (Or was that "pure friction and totally irresistible?" Damn legalese...)

"People are trying to use Anna Nicole as a scapegoat in a contract dispute that she's not a party to and wasn't even aware of, and they should be ashamed of themselves," Stern said in e-mailed statement to The Associated Press. (Uh-uh, counselor...should never use "party" and "Anna Nicole Smith" in a sentence. Very dangerous word combination there...)

Smith was not drunk and brought a back-up outfit with her, but was told she "looked beautiful and not to change a thing," Stern said. (Are they sure that's what was said? It's hard to know what is said when someone's cleavage is in your mouth!)

Besides Trimspa, its parent company, Goen Technologies Corp., is also named in the lawsuit. (And their slogan is, "When the Goen gets tough, the tough get sued"?)

Based in Whippany, N.J., Trimspa said in a statement on its Web site that it has had no contact, negotiations or contract with Live 8 Productions and plans to defend itself in the lawsuit. (Nice to know they have nothing to hide...let's hope they have it noted in large enough font on their website!)

Trimspa said it did have a contract with Winnaman & Associates, a California-based marketing company that sold it the commercial time and interviews during Live 8, according to the company statement. (Meanwhile, the last known address of Winnaman & Associates turned out to be a storefront in downtown Burbank that shared space with a dry-cleaners and a donut shop.)

Trimspa blamed Winnaman & Associates for not fulfilling the terms of the contract and asserted that the lawsuit's remarks about Smith were "pure propaganda and borders on slanderous." (Sure that wasn't "pure paraphernalia and borders on sluttishness?" Damn that legalese again!)

A message left for Winnaman & Associates was not immediately returned. (Gee...what a surprise!)

Sudiegirl sez:

If that bimbo keeps up, she's going to make me look appealing!