Wednesday, October 04, 2006

I'm finally getting around to commenting on this...

OK...I may get flamed on this, I may not. I am just speaking my mind, and last time I heard, that's what this blog was for. So here I am and here we go. Please forgive for me taking so much from the text of the article, but I just want to examine them a little more in depth.

First, the headline:
Mark Foley claims being molested as teen

Now, in case you've been living under a rock or something the past few days, Congressman Mark Foley from Florida resigned from his political post amidst reports of inappropriate e-mails to former House pages.

Here's some early "meat" from the article.

Attorney David Roth, speaking on Foley's behalf at a Florida news conference Tuesday, said Foley was molested between ages 13 and 15 by a clergyman. He declined to identify the clergyman or the church, but Foley is Roman Catholic. "Mark does not blame the trauma he sustained as a young adolescent for his totally inappropriate" e-mails and instant messages, Roth said. "He continues to offer no excuse whatsoever for his conduct." Roth, who spoke for Foley while the congressman is in rehab for alcohol abuse and mental illness, said Foley denied having inappropriate sexual contact with minors and said he was under the influence of alcohol when he wrote the notes.

OK, something for each paragraph.

(1) I guess the revelation that he was molested plus his disclosure re: denomination helps me put two and two together. I think that's what the lawyer tried to say without saying it.

(2) Human nature never ceases to amaze me. For everyone who doesn't confront the abuse they've suffered in some way, there's one who does break the cycle.

(3) Who's defining "contact"? Bill Clinton? Here's how Merriam-Webster defines it:

As a noun:

1 a : union or junction of surfaces
b : the apparent touching or mutual tangency of the limbs of two celestial bodies or of the disk of one body with the shadow of another during an eclipse, transit, or occultation
c (1) : the junction of two electrical conductors through which a current passes
(2) : a special part made for such a junction

2 a : ASSOCIATION, RELATIONSHIP b : CONNECTION, COMMUNICATION c : an establishing of communication with someone or an observing or receiving of a significant signal from a person or object

As a verb:

2 a : to enter or be in contact with : JOIN
b : to get in communication with

If you use the Clintonesque approach, 1a would fit while seeming cold.

If you use the Sudiegirl understanding, you could use 2a, 2b (noun) or the verb meaning.

Therefore, wouldn't it be logical to use the Sudiegirl approach to "contact"? First, if Foley is taken to criminal or civil court, "contact" is going to be a problem. He contacted the boys, and instead of talking about baseball scores, or the new James Bond movie, he's playin' Long Dong Silver.

Therefore, inappropriate + sexual + contact = look no further than this man.

"As is so often the case with victims of abuse, Mark advises that he kept his shame to himself for almost 40 years," Roth said.

That I can understand. It's not to easy to fess up to stuff like that unless you're on Jerry Springer and there's a check waiting for you backstage.

"There was absolutely no inappropriate sexual contact with any minor... and any suggestion that Mark Foley is a pedophile is false," Roth said.

Uh...Mr. Roth? You need to go to Merriam Webster and find what I found. Also, don't listen to Bill Clinton for legal strategies. Your client needs to tell the truth. Period. Drunk or sober, he did it. If the e-mails are traced to his IP address(es), he did it. Not the one-armed man or Paris Hilton. He did it.

Also, I see you're employing the two-prong defense...he DIDN'T do it, but if he DID, he was drunk so it doesn't count. My BS meter is goin' through the roof on this one, folks...

Roth also acknowledged for the first time that the former congressman is gay, saying the disclosure was part of his client's "recovery." "Mark Foley wants you to know he is a gay man," Roth said.

OK...I'm glad Mr. Foley wants me to know that. However, being gay and being a pedophile are two completely different things. Why do people mix up this crap?

Foley, who is 52 and single, represented parts of Palm Beach County for 12 years until he abruptly resigned Friday. The FBI and Florida law enforcement officials are investigating whether he violated any laws.

My shoot-from-the-hip response? YUP. I know they have to investigate it, but let's face it. Teenage boys are usually not the kind to report such things to their parents, let alone to the authorities. So we have two scenarios: three separate teenage boys are all making the same claims without being acquainted with each other, or three separate teenage boys all know each other and are conspiring to overthrow Mr. Foley's Congressional seat. I'd say the former. Mr. Foley's lawyer hopes for the latter.

At the Capitol, House Speaker Dennis Hastert cast aside calls for his resignation Tuesday amid talk from Democrats that Republicans knew of Foley's questionable communications months ago but failed to act.

I'd have to say if I were on the Senate floor, I'd be pulling the "Frankenstein angry villager" act and bringing my flaming torch to Capitol Hill. However, they'd kick me out for it, so I'd just have to walk around with a Sharpie pen and look menacing. "I'm going to draw a mustache on you if you don't quit, Hastert!!!"

So, there you have thoughts on the whole matter.

And you know what?

Even though Mr. Roth won't be listening to my ideas anytime soon, I have faith that maybe he'll be disbarred someday for photocopying his wanker while drunk and text-messaging an intern.

Then he'll want my advice. And I'll charge him PLENTY.