And now, from "The Continuing Adventures of a drunken, 2nd rate country singer with a dead, famous dad.." and Yahoo! News...

Sudiegirl sez: Ah, Bocephus…where did you take the wrong turning? Who cares? I’m gonna rip into this like Naomi Campbell on a new assistant. See ya at the bottom…

Hank Williams Jr. Cited in Warrant
Tue Apr 4, 11:32 AM ET

Hank Williams Jr. plans to surrender on a warrant issued in an alleged assault on a hotel waitress last month, his publicist said. (That’s nice…besides, if he doesn’t surrender, I don’t think the Grand Ole Opry building can be considered “sanctuary”…)

Williams left on a hunting trip early Monday before being notified of the warrant in the evening, publicist Kirt Webster told The Associated Press late Monday night. (Always a good idea for a drunk redneck to go hunting right before his surrender…great strategy!)

"He will be traveling to Memphis and voluntarily surrendering (Tuesday) and then we'll know what the allegations are and the whole deal," Webster said. (Well, obviously Bocephus doesn’t read the papers. It’s all right there!)

Holly Hornbeak, 19, has told police she was waiting tables at the Peabody Hotel's lobby bar March 18 when the country superstar asked to kiss her and lifted her off the ground in a chokehold. (Ah…so this is a courting ritual of some sort. How much more worthy of “Wild Kingdom” could this be?)

The warrant was issued by Magistrate Rhonda Davis, Shelby County Sheriff's department spokesman Steve Shuler told The Commercial Appeal newspaper.

Williams, 56, has been in Memphis since his daughters Holly Williams, 25, and Hilary Williams, 27, were seriously injured in a March 15 car crash near Dundee, Miss.

Webster said the singer hasn't been interviewed by police. (Well, the interview should be interesting…I can just hear Bocephus say, “Well, hell…she wouldn’t have choked if she hadn’t struggled so damn much. The South will rise again, dammit!”)

"There's nothing to say," Webster said. "He doesn't know what all the allegations are and what the charges are." (Then obviously, the waitress wasn’t the only one who suffered from oxygen depletion to the brain.)

Hilary Williams underwent another minor surgery Monday, and doctors were discussing moving her to a Nashville hospital in coming weeks, Webster said.

Holly Williams has been released from the hospital.

Hank Williams Jr. has had a string of No. 1 hits including "Family Tradition" and "All My Rowdy Friends Are Coming Over Tonight." He has sung the theme for ABC's "Monday Night Football" since 1989. (Of which we’re all HORRIBLY aware.)

His father, a star in the late 1940s to early 1950s, had hits such as "Your Cheatin' Heart" and "I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry." He died Jan. 1, 1953, when Hank Jr. was 3. (So instead of going through some kind of counseling – which I know wasn’t available in the ‘50s – he delights us with wacky, thug-like antics. I wonder what he’ll do next…desecrate a church or crash his car into an unwed mother’s home? Either way, I smell benefit concert as a way to redeem himself!)

Sudiegirl’s final opinion?

Well…hmm…ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL!!!???????

Sorry…that’s the best I’ve got.