And now, from the "I'd like to see Dr. Phil advise her on this!" files and Yahoo! News...

Sudiegirl sez: This should be interesting. I wonder how she’ll cover up her true personality? Or is this just a bizarre publicity stunt? She’d better stick to the red carpet if that’s the case.

Rivers Looks for Love on Match.com
Wed Mar 22, 7:46 AM ET

Joan Rivers is looking for love in cyberspace. (Well, aren’t we all?)

So far, no luck. The 72-year-old red-carpet critic and comedian (she’s HOW OLD? IS THAT RIGHT?) said she and assistant Matt Stewart created a profile for her on Match.com. (OK…have any of you happened upon her profile yet? If so, could you send me a link to it? Maybe I can fix her up with H#2. I owe him one…)

"We were hoping to meet Mr. Right," Rivers told The Associated Press in a recent interview. "We didn't even get a wink." (Maybe that’s not so bad, Joan. I mean, lots of people LIE about themselves on the Internet, and they take advantage of others every day.)

"Maybe there is somebody sitting out there in the east side of New York," she said. (Uh-huh. And Sudiegirl’s got Brad Pitt wrapped around her pinky. YEAH, RIGHT!)

The profile lists Rivers as looking for a man between the ages of 65 and 75. (With the exception of my regular readers, how many guys that age are actually ON the NET?)
Rivers doesn't want to get married again, though. The former talk show host was married to British producer Edgar Rosenberg, who committed suicide in 1987. (I remember hearing about that, and it was sad. They really worked hard at their marriage, from what I remember.)

As far as children go, Rivers already has one, daughter Melissa, as well as a 5-year-old grandson, Edgar. Her Match.com profile answer under the children section says "probably not." (Well, that’s certainly different than how I would say it – “OH MY GOD NO! YOU’RE KIDDING, RIGHT?”)

"Not right now, but I got two eggs in the refrigerator," she quipped. "I should have written, 'not right now unless it is very, very important to you'." (I wouldn’t have mentioned the eggs. I’m just sayin’…)

Of course any man in Rivers' life would have to work around her busy schedule. Rivers will be performing her standup act in Tunica, Miss., on Saturday and will be touring Australia in April. (Yep, and he’d have to carry ALL her luggage…no small feat.)

Sudiegirl’s final opinion?

Oh boy. I don’t know – if I were a celebrity, I’d just buy someone if it weren’t illegal, you know?

Let’s just hope that someone doesn’t take advantage of her. I don’t know who I’d feel sorrier for – her, or the guy she’d stomp on with her Manolo Blaniks.

Yeowch!

Sudiegirl